As the train rolled out of the station the young woman sitting down next to him pulled out her cell phone and started talking loudly.
‘Hi sweetheart, it’s Sue. Yes, I know it’s the six thirty not the four thirty but I had a long meeting. No, honey, not with that Kevin from the accounting office. It was with the boss. No sweetheart, you’re the only one in my life. Yes, I’m sure. Cross my heart.’
Fifteen minutes later she was still talking loudly. When the man sitting next to her had had enough, he leaned over, and said into the phone
‘Sue, hang up the phone and come back to bed.’
Sue does not use her cell phone in public any longer.
“Cash cheque or charge?’ I asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her purse, I noticed a remote control for the television in her purse.
‘So, do you always carry your TV remote?’ I asked
‘No’, she replied, ‘ but my husband refused to come shopping with me and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.’
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically,
‘Relatives of yours?’ ‘Yep,’ the wife replied, ‘in-laws.’
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realised that the next day he would need his wife to wake him at 5 am for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence he wrote on a piece of paper ‘Please wake me at 5am’. He left if where he knew she would find it.
The next morning the man woke up only to find it was 9am. Furious, he was about to go and find out why his wife had not woken him up when he saw a note by the bed.
“It is 5am. Wake up.’
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day. 30,000 to a man’s 15,000.The wife replied, ‘The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.The husband then turned to his wife and asked, ‘What?’