Dividends

‘Tis a strange tale, but true. Once upon a time many, many years ago, there lived a young newly wed couple. Being wise beyond their years, they knew ’twas important to invest for the future.

The hard young working husband’s job often took him away from his new bride. On one such occasion exciting news came to the blushing bride about a grand investment opportunity.

It was a ‘hot, insider tip’, so the informant said. The time to invest was short. A decision must be made forthwith. There was no time to waste. With trembling hand she phoned to discuss the matter with her husband. Together they decided it was too good to ignore. After all, the informant was an upstanding, honest man who could be trusted.

Following her instructions to the letter, she phoned the bank. She authorised the purchase of many, many shares at mere cents a piece.

With excitement the young couple awaited news of increasing wealth. In the meantime, the husband subscribed to an investment magazine of good repute. The very first article he read issued a stern warning. In bold black print the words echoed and reverberated in his head. He read them to his bride.  “Do not trust any hot tips given to you by your brother-in-law...” it stated. They laughed and they laughed.

The waiting was soon forgotten. Annual reports arrived with no news of any merit worth noting. Together they decided to keep the  share certificate. It was a good story, they said.

old coupleThe years rolled on. News of increasing wealth had long been forgotten. Then on this day in the year of Our Lord 2017 a dividend cheque arrived in the mail. With shaking hands the now retired husband opened the envelope. Smiling, he went inside to show his now retired wife. Together, they laughed, and laughed, and laughed :

© Raili Tanska

Steps for Peace
See the funny side of life. Me
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17 thoughts on “Dividends

  1. Brilliant!! Though sometimes these things do work My grandmother had an insurance policy on my mother where she paid 2 old pence a week. When my mother married, aged 20, Granny gave her the policy. She forgot all about it, till she was 95 – when she cashed it in – it was worth £1,367. So not a bad return.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So obscure I missed it, lol ! Although I have often heard futures investments discuss pork bellies. What is this never-ending fascination with pig’s bellies?! Every restaurant features them as succulently delicious (they’re not!), stocks and shares tout them as The.Best.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I didn’t know porkie tums were of genuine interest to investors. The movie’s about a young wife whose husband (Pete) is struggling to make ends meet. She takes advice from a dodgy geezer (For Pete’s sake) about pork belly futures and secretly borrows money from a gang to buy them, with a plan to give hubby a lovely surprise. When they drop in value, she has to do repay the dosh by carrying out a crime for the gang, but she hashes up, so the debt gets sold to a nastier gang, who ask her to do a worse job to repay them. She messes up that job, too, so the debt is resold, and so it goes on. It ends happily and is a funny movie with a good side story. 😀 😀

        Liked by 1 person

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