Saturday Smiles

Insurance Funnies

😀  A truck backed through my windshield into my wife’s face.

😮  A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

😛  The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

😉  I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.

😮  In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

😯  An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

😕 I told the police that I was not injured but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.

😀    I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.

😕   The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run so I ran over him.

😯   I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentlemen as he bounced off the hood of my car.

😀   The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

😕  I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

😎      The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end.

😀   😀   😀

thinking emoticon

William Golding, British poet, novelist and playwright had this to say about women:

I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men. They are far superior and always have been. Whatever you give a woman, she makes greater. If you give her sperm, she will give you a  baby. If you give her a house, she will give you a home. If you give her groceries, she will give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she will give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit! 

Have a leisurely and happy weekend 

Raili Tanska

Steps for Peace

…keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life’s a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about. ― Marilyn Monroe
Advertisements

20 thoughts on “Saturday Smiles

  1. Very funny. But quite sad that the level of language usage causes these gaffs. they tell us on the news most nights that “the car lost control” – What, all by itself I ask!

    1. Cows are cool. Did you know they love listening to classical music. There’s a YouTube video (of course there is!) of a bunch of musicians who stop by the roadside to a play to a herd of cows. They all stop munching and stand by the fence listening 🙂

Your thoughts ...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s