Rage-o-meter Empathy


Do you know what a rage-o-meter is ?  Like me, you probably have a pretty good idea. But better than that, my blogging friend Bun Karyoudo having been challenged to write a guest post about Things That Drive Me Crazy jumped in the deep end for a lived experience of it. In the interests of background context to this article I strongly recommend that you have a peek at it. It’s an enlightening read.

Ever since reading it myself, I have given a great deal of thought to the subject.  Having experienced a disturbingly enlightened light bulb moment of ‘walking in his shoes’, I am compelled to delve into the subject deeper myself.  Not that I expect my feet would fit comfortably into his shoes. It is reasonable to assume that being a male, his feet are larger than mine which are a dainty European size 39 (blush). Thus walking in them – Bun’s shoes that is – would be somewhat difficult. But I digress.

First, a summary of Bun’s rage-o-meter moments  measured in registered Blips!  (note: the Ö’s next to each Blip!  register my level of empathy. For reasons of research validity I also have included points of difference in my experience. You will these in brackets below the Blip! rage-o-meter summary ) :

  • Blip! Irritatingly luminous display on wife’s alarm clock in the morning

(I have a husband, being a heterosexual female. And he does not have a luminous display alarm clock or in fact any kind of alarm clock. We are both retired and thus have no need for one.)

  • Blip! (ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ) Empty cardboard tube in toilet roll holder
  • Blip! Blip! Head-bumping incident in bathroom   (Neither bathroom in our home has a shaving cabinet with mirrored doors)
  • Blip! Blip! Blip! (ÖÖÖÖÖ) Empty shampoo bottles in shower
  • Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! (ÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ) Wet towel in bathroom
  • Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! (Ö) Drain cover clogged with hair
  • Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Bathroom door won’t open   (Fortunately both our bathroom door locks function well. Getting to use thebathrooms can be problematic.)
  • Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip! Blip!  He decided to call off the experiment given the high level of agitation caused by conscious monitoring of said level of agitation

My foray into data research for my Blip! response is of course more detached than Bun’s given I was not present during his experiment. Although I did wonder whether in fact he had somehow wondered into the wrong bathroom by accident. Which would have been interesting given we live in different countries. Nevertheless, the fleeting thought did occur to me. You see, his description was so vivid that for a moment I was convinced he HAD been in our bathroom! My excitement at possibly meeting the great Bun was quickly overshadowed by the horror of what I thought he had seen and experienced in it. Our bathroom that is. Ergo my level of agitation becomes a mute point at this point. And may in some respects invalidate the validity of my Ö’s.  I mention this here in case purists begin to question the scientific rigour of this ongoing research into rage-o-meter empathy. It is to be remembered that qualitative research, aka the lived experience, allows leeway beyond the rigors of the detached, rational quantitative research.

The Ö measure I have recorded is based purely on my memory recall of corresponding events similar to Bun’s  Blip! events and my own resultant recalled level of agitation. And perhaps marred in objectivity due to my intense empathy with Bun’s lived experience. One could argue that the validity of the Ö measure is thus flawed. Nevertheless I offer it as a point of interest and background to my own further reflections  triggered by the reading of Bun’s Blip! rage-o-meter.

You see, the thought has occurred to me that there is a whole rich, unexplored, untapped field of research here. I have two children. Bun has two children. My two are older. And have brought another two into the household of the opposite gender. Yet there are amazing similarities. I for one would be most interested to see if Bun’s experience would continue to parallel mine when his two mature. Let me explain.

There are potential gold-mines of rage-o-meter options available :

Laundry :  Mine do their own. I will not delve into this further here as I do not want to offend any sensitivities.

Bedrooms:  Mine manage their own living environments, wild life included. Except the arachnophobic one.

Kitchen:  Mine cook their own meals. Sometimes. Clean up. Sometimes. Take rubbish out. Sometimes.

Refrigerator:  Mine fill them with left overs. Which they do not eat. I in turn donate them to the neighbour’s dogs before they turn green. And after we have tired of eating leftovers.

Rubbish : Mine fill the bins to overflowing with take-away containers.

Clothesline : Mine use it as an outdoor wardrobe.

Bun, what do you think ? Are  you willing to continue the rage-o-meter experiment  as a longitudinal, comparative research trial across continents ?  I do recall your aspirations for fame and glory in the fields of publishing and acting. This may get in the way. I just wondered…..

© Raili Tanska

Image – Pixabay


16 thoughts on “Rage-o-meter Empathy

  1. The dueling rage-o-meters. What have I started?

    If you do find Bun in your bathroom, let me know. I’m curious about what’s under that paper bag he wears on his head. Come to think of it, how would you recognize him? Unless, of course, he’s wearing the bag.

    Thanks for the chuckle!

    1. My pleasure. I will of course keep you informed given you started it. The paper bag will be a dead give away. Sans bag? Perhaps a non-Aussie twang in his voice. Bathroom stranger danger would alert me to explore the possibility of a Bun invasion.

  2. Thanks for making me laugh 🙂
    I think you’re off to a great start with your research, but you have a long way to go before the paper is ready to be handed in. Could you find a scientific method of measurung rage, such as examining and recording heightened skin colour, or the level of resistance between gritted teeth? 😀

    1. Now there’s a thought….. perhaps a heat sensor ? I must put these on the list to discuss with Bun. We will, of course, give you due credit as a valuable collaborator and contributor !

    1. Awesome ! I think anyone with kids probably can 🙂 If Bun is keen to continue with the research, perhaps you could become a contributing partner ?!
      Thanks for the follow – really, really, truly appreciate it>

Your thoughts ...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s